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End Of Life


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#1 iowahawkeye

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 03:26 AM

A friend is now dealing with end of life issues , not his own, but... This reminds me of the fact that my dad had explored the price of cremation and specified a particular treatemant at his passing. My mother, at a point of extreme distress could rely on his writing to put the vultures, some of who were his children, at bay!

Just how does one go about planning for end of life here in Mexico. I have a coffin table, but do not expect to use it to display a coffin, though that might be a business idea.

Sorry, I can be flippant, but the question is what happens when one of us wakes up next to a cold partner? What do we do after we scream in grief?
Then, after the mechanics, what else do we do..
"facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence." John Adams



#2 whazzoo

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 08:42 AM

Sorry, I can be flippant, but the question is what happens when one of us wakes up next to a cold partner? What do we do after we scream in grief?
Then, after the mechanics, what else do we do..


You do what everyone has done since the beginning of time. You grieve for a period, slowly get yourself together and move on with life. What ever direction that may take you.

Whazzoo

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#3 lippincottfarm

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 08:59 AM

Yucatanliving published a good article several years ago titled "The Final Adios Addendum". YK, can you link it to here? I don't know how to do that. It gives a very good accounting of what needs to be done. If you own a Mexican titled car or other items other than a house held in a trust, you should have a Mexican will. I also recommend giving someone power of attorney to make decisions for you or to conduct your business. Just because you are in a foreign country, doesn't mean you don' t need the basics. It is the same in Mexico as in the US.

#4 HenryVG

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 10:09 AM

Must any power of attorney forms be in Spanish? Must they be on file with a Notario?

My memory isn't as good as it used to be, but my memory isn't as good as it used to be, either.


#5 lippincottfarm

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 11:29 AM

I executed a POA a couple of months ago. Yes it must be in Spanish and the notario records it. It cost 2000 pesos, I think. It might have cost 2500 pesos. I don't remember now. The cost was similar to what a POA costs here in the US.

#6 lippincottfarm

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 11:43 AM

I should add that a POA can be limited, just as it can be in the US. My neighbor has the right to do my yearly car fees, pay my bills, respond to legal notices or appear on my behalf to file complaints. He does not have the right to sell any vehicles or to sell my house.

#7 Dave_in_Ont

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 03:01 PM

Lippincott...I believe the article (actually two) you are refering to are at this link...

The Final Adios

Both are very useful articles. Be sure to print out the PDF files at the end of the original topic.

Driving Through Mexico


Seven years snow free, and still counting on my luck!!!


#8 lippincottfarm

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 03:36 PM

Thanks Dave. You're a peach.

#9 iowahawkeye

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 04:29 PM

Both Lippincott and Dave have provided a positive response to my initial question, but one that requires a preplanning that is not always a high priority.

This discussion reminds me that my US will that I wrote just 2 years ago is woefully out of date, and the Mexican will that my partner and I have is inadequate. For instance, the car that is here is "mine", registered under my visa, etc. At the point nobody cares about Aduana's $300, but how does she get through the next checkpoint?

The question I was trying to ask is, "if the absolutely unexpected happens who do you call?" "Where do you start?"

In the link provided the people involved were aware of the probable outcome several days in advance and collected documents.

It is good to prepare, but many of us are going to put off the preparation as if it can never happen.
"facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence." John Adams

#10 Dave_in_Ont

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 04:43 PM

Hawkeye...Just yesterday, Shirl and I updated our "specs" with our designated POA and executrix, here in Canada (Shirl's daughter). Included in the update was contact numbers of friends in Mexico. Once we arrive in Mexico we will provide those same friends with our list of contact numbers in Canada.

As you say, most of us are aware of the need to prepare for whatever occurs. Many don't. We are doing so.

CYA in a few days mi amigo!

Hawkeye...If you are asking for actual telephone numbers to call in the event of a natural death in Mexico...I have no idea.

I'd love to know though.

Anyone have that info?

As painful as the topic is, this sounds like a topic that could/should be explored and maintained.

Any input here would be appreciated.

Driving Through Mexico


Seven years snow free, and still counting on my luck!!!


#11 YolistoKhaki

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 06:09 PM

Thanks Dave.

Yucatan Living has the original article, written by Lorna Gail Dallin, Martha Lindley and Cheryl Caddy. That one is called "Death in a Foreign Country."

Then, we've got Lorna Gail's actual experience, called "The Final Adios - Addendum."

The Final Adios PDF is HERE.

and there is also an Emergency Info Form that EVERYone should print. That form is HERE.

#12 dugin

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 07:24 PM

Although much of this may be covered in the articles cited above, there are a couple of ''first steps''.

If you have a regular doctor, the first step would be to call the doctor and they should be able to come out and fill out a death certificate. If you don't have a doctor, an autopsy may (probably) be required, which is handled by the state or municipal forensic services.

In that case, it would be a good idea to contact the US consulate (if you are a US citizen). Call them, and leave a message if you can't get through to a person -- someone will call you back very soon, and will be able to help you with the necessary steps. You will need to advise the consulate of the death, in any case, and they will provide certified copies of registration of death of a US citizen abroad (for Canadians, or any other nationality, presumably you would contact your country's embassy in DF).

Next, contact a funeral company -- there are many, and several are cited in the above articles. There are probably funeral companies in Progreso. The staff will come and collect the body, but will need the doctor's certificate. They will walk you through the ''tramites'' involved in reporting a death to the Registro Civil, etc. They will arrange whatever services you want (cremation, burial, etc.), and help with the paperwork if you wish to take the remains back to your home country. A bilingual friend is very useful here -- even if you speak ''ok'' Spanish, grief and emotion may make communication difficult.

You will need to have access to cash to cover funeral costs (around 10,000 pesos for a simple cremation and standard tramites). As I recall, you may need to pay when the body is picked up, but this may vary according to the situation or the particular company you use.

One thing to check -- to take care of paperwork with the Registro Civil, at least in Merida, a relative (spouse or blood relative) is necessary. I'm not sure what the situation is when there is no relative, although certainly this happens frequently -- perhaps someone can add information on this.

#13 Dave_in_Ont

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 07:48 PM

Thanks Dugin..This is more info that will be useful for folks who are in the unfortunate situation of dealing with a death of a spouse/partner or friend.

With your permission, I would like to add your comments to others on this topic and archive them on my website?

I know my website is "titled" Driving Through Mexico but it seems like it is expanding into an archive of other important information topics also.

In my humble opinion, Rolly Brook'swebsite is still the "Bible" for Ex-Pat's living in Mexico.

Driving Through Mexico


Seven years snow free, and still counting on my luck!!!


#14 YolistoKhaki

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 08:28 PM

If you don't have a relative in Yucatan, you need to "prepare an affidavit stating who you do wish to be the person responsible for your remains and goods. Have the affidavit
translated and notarized. This person must also present an authenticated document of identification." ...so it is important that the designated responsible person has their authenticated document of identification as well.

Also: "If a U.S. citizen dies in Merida and does not have necessary documentation,
the U.S. consulate can intervene to assist if the Consulate has information about the deceased registered with them. For Canadians, being registered with the Canadian Embassy will be a help and the Honorary Consul in Cancun may be able to facilitate receiving information from Canada if needed." I know we have a lot of expats who just flat balk at registering with the Consulate - but you never know when that can save loved ones a whole lot of unnecessary grief, time and money.

#15 iowahawkeye

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 09:12 PM

Dave and I will be building a page or pages over the next 4 weeks that will hopefully be useful to people facing emergency eol and long term eol situations while living in Yucatan. We invite contribution from all Yolisto members, including those who do not wish to hear from us. PM me and I will respond with an address.
"facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence." John Adams

#16 Dave_in_Ont

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 09:28 PM

Looking forward to working with you on this topic Hawkeye. I think, between us, we should be able to compile a pretty comprehensive list of articles and information.

There is lot's of info out there, it just needs to be compiled and archived in one location.

Driving Through Mexico


Seven years snow free, and still counting on my luck!!!


#17 YolistoKhaki

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Posted 09 September 2012 - 09:42 PM

Dave and I will be building a page or pages over the next 4 weeks that will hopefully be useful to people facing emergency eol and long term eol situations while living in Yucatan. We invite contribution from all Yolisto members, including those who do not wish to hear from us. PM me and I will respond with an address.


Re: long term eol situations

That's the one! The Merida Men's Club takes a stab at it every once in a while - and then we don't hear anything for a while... this is a puzzle that expats all across Mexico are attempting to solve - sometimes with a little luck - but mostly not to their satisfaction. We had a very good article on this topic on Yucatan Living - be sure to read all of the comments. Some have excellent information in them.

#18 dugin

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Posted 10 September 2012 - 04:52 PM

Among the comments to the Yucatan Living article that Khaki cited was one by a local resident who lost her husband a few years ago. She recommended Funeraria Quevedo (the ''q'' was left off in her comment, but I'm pretty sure that that is the funeraria she used), and she noted that their staff included English speakers, and that they had experience dealing with foreigners and foreign documents. Dave and Hawk-eye might want to contact them, and see if they can add some useful information.

I've dealt with Funeraria Perches, in Mérida centro, twice now -- they are very helpful, but do not speak English, so you need a bit more than a basic level of Spanish, or bilingual assistance (which the US consulate would probably offer, in a pinch).

One additional comment -- for US citizens, I recommend that you contact the Social Security Administration yourself, and not trust the consulate to do so (as was recommended in the Yucatan Living article) -- if there is a delay or some confusion (this happened to me once), it could result in benefits continuing to be paid, which then have to be returned. If those benefits have been deposited in a Mexican bank, that can be a real PITA.

And Dave, sure, feel free to use any comments I've posted.

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Posted 10 September 2012 - 07:24 PM

Hawkeye,

Your information is very useful. We are debating driving or flying and I have my dog with me. I called Continental the other night and was told I had to have a broker does anyone know about trying to find one? I feel very lost and we want to move within the next 2 months.

Jody

#20 whazzoo

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Posted 10 September 2012 - 08:27 PM

Hawkeye,

Your information is very useful. We are debating driving or flying and I have my dog with me. I called Continental the other night and was told I had to have a broker does anyone know about trying to find one? I feel very lost and we want to move within the next 2 months.

Jody


I have pm'd you as this is not the thread for that info.

Whazzoo

Aerocretos de Mexico, S. de R.L. de C.V.

General Contractors

999-273-0840 www.aerocretosdemexico.com 999-955-0503

 

 





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